I have been enjoying The Palace, finding it surprisingly convincing and realistic (which is not to say I think it is perfectly authentic but there have been few howlers than I expected). But last night's was really dreadful. I thought that they had proper ex-Buck House people advising them, but last night's was so full of howlers that anybody who watched the Monarchy Propaganda Brainwashing job last autumn as I did (Know Your Enemy...) could have stacked up the howlers:
- State Banquets are Evening Suit. They are so Evening Suit that even Gordon "I don't do White Tie" Brown could only get out of Evening Suit by wearing a kilt and Gordon ain't never go to wear a kilt. I suppose it's possible that the new King would have abolished Evening Suit, but you would have thought it would have been discussed. And Princess Sloane still wouldn't have worn a Primark Dress even if Evening Suit had been abolished
- Posh Tory Totty from Party Animals would never have turned up late for a meeting with the King citing 'I got stuck at work' as an excuse especially when the meeting was about work. And 5pm meeting about work would never have turned into dinner, just like that
- The new chef would not have f***ed up on the crockery for serving dinner because there is a 'to-do' list for State Banquets which is checked, double checked and quite possibly triple checked. It wouldn't be left to the new chef to busk it
- A State Banquet for India (a very important country indeed) would not be Palace Employees and a handful of token Indians cramped round one long table in a pokey room. Try The Great and The Good (eg where was the Prime Minister, no, not Gordon, the fictional one), Eminent Indians in Britain, CEOs etc of companies with Trading Partnerships with India, and lots of lots of Indians, in a massive State Banqueting Room with dozens of tables seating dozens each. Guests wouldn't wander into dinner at the sound of a flunky saying 'Right folks, get stuck in, grub's up'. Maybe there would be a formal walk-in to pass The Receiving Line
- if that diamond necklace was so important to Gujeratis, and normally stored in The Tower, the Royal Jeweller wouldn't casually pass it to Princess Sloane to take back to Queen Mummy Bitter to casually pass to King WetBlanket
- Royals don't drink out of cheap 1960s Habitat red glasses
- There is no way that the King would offer to fund an orphanage for abandoned girls in Madras without causing a diplomatic incident - for starters, he meant Chennai, and secondly, it is an implied criticism of Indian society and an insult to the Government, who claim not to want International Aid, anyway
Which is a shame, because it's been a hoot so far. And it's fun spotting the DNA links between this, Party Animals and Mistresses. I haven't been too bothered thus far with some stretching of truths and realities, but last night was so riddled with them, it dragged the batting average right down.
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