We went to Windsor a couple of years ago but they wouldn't let us into the Castle - too late in the day, or something. So we went back on Saturday. The journey, via Clapham Junction, was uneventful; when we arrived at Windsor we decided to go for a drink, but they wouldn't serve us in the pub opposite the station, the Royal something or other. Bollocks to them; they were too incompetent to observe the usual practice of serving they who are at the bar first. So we walked out. Never to return. Instead we got served in Wetherspoons and ended up in conversation with a couple. Basically, he was in a wheelchair and we were at the only table that was really accessible for a wheelchair, so I invited them to join us, largely because we were only staying for one drink. They had come down from Henley specially because it was the Queen's birthday. I didn't have a clue. They were obviously Royalists, and we had to bite our tongues. They weren't happy with film "The Queen" because Philip and the old (now deceased) cow were portrayed as preferring animals to people. Hmm. Apparently, the Queen Mother was a lovely person; on one occasion, in 1980 (my Freudian slip was originally to type that as 1908...), she mixed with ordinary people. Jimmy started telling the story of someone he knows used to chauffeur the Queen Mother. I dreaded what was coming, but, thankfully, in time, he amended the anecdote from "She was an alcoholic and you had to wear a tin-hat when she farted - often" to "Apparently, she was very polite..."
It may seem strange a couple of dyed-in-the-wool Republicans going to see Royal Residences, but I don't have a problem with that. After all, by rights they belong to us, the people. Besides, we have inadvertently found a way to defraud the system legitimately. The State Apartments weren't open, because of it being HMQ's birthday, so we got in half price, and, on exit, we got our tickets endorsed to return again and again in the next 12 months for free.
It was quite pleasant, but, in the end, they let you see just enough so that you can continue your worship of them as gods, if that is your thing, but they don't really let us see really how the castle is. And it's like they're doing us a great favour by allowing us to peer at selected parts and buy over-priced rubbish souvenirs. The best bit was Queen Mary's Doll House. One queues in order to go round and look at this 1:12 miniature town house. And observe the glazed look of other tourists who are just ticking it off the list of 'must see'. I was looking at the display cases of some dolls and designer clothes - France and Marianne - which were presents to the queen and her sister when they were kids. Some ghastly woman behind me in the 'queue' kept shoulder-barging me. I obviously wasn't going fast enough for her. so I turned round and told her to stop shoving me. she didn't stop, so I told her again that she was perfectly free to move from my left to my right and progress beyond me. she was whizzing round, not taking anything in. Shrug
After a pint in a nice pub by the gate to the Long Walk, we went for a bit of a walk on the Long Walk. Nice of them to let us peasants traverse an eensy bit of 'their' ground, innit. We finished the evening with a cheap and cheerful meal and home by nine. I was knackered - collapsed into bed after my bath. Still, it was a really nice day out. We shall go again, in the autumn or winter. We shall also view Buck House State Apartments. Know thine enemy, I reckon...
I still haven't figured out why anybody would build a Royal Residence in the flightpath of one of the world's busiest airports.
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