Carmen B cast

Jimmy and I took ourselves along to the Royal Opera House last night for what promised to be an enjoyable evening.

What could possibly go wrong?

A great and familiar opera, one that is simultaneously easily accessible and yet rewards repeated study. One with fabulous tunes and exciting orchestrations. A strong unconfusing and believable storyline, three dimensional characters, and to cap it all, a colourful, exciting and intriguing production.

What could possibly go wrong?

In a nutshell, it was dire.

I posted the following to a couple of newsgroups:

If the Royal Opera House claims to be one of the world's top places it has no business whatsoever employing people to whom 'provincial' is a compliment.

I speak specifically of the world's worst conductor, Philippe Auguin, who turned the Act II opening (Flamenco dancers etc) and Votre Toast into funeral dirges. I don't believe in booing, and I'm passionately anti-capital punishment, but booing's too good for the likes of those who ought to be taken out and shot (no doubt a very nice man who helps old ladies across the road and is kind to children and animals). I did get a slight frisson at the end of Act II with the "La liberte" but that was entirely down to Bizet, and nothing whatsoever to do with the shonky amateur conducting.

And I speak even more specifically of the unreservedly dreadful tenor Marco Berti as Don Jose. I had read that he is a wooden actor, and I can live with that if the voice is up to something, but he was dreadful. Rarely on pitch, and dragging his women down with him, a really ugly sound, more barking/bellowing than singing, the worst 'La fleur qui..." ever. A disgrace. Loud, yes, but I was actually covering my ears up he was that bad. In future I will actively avoid him. Loud, yes, and that might suit some opera houses, but isn't good enough for the ROH. I actually can live with the odd note being slightly off, but when 40% of the notes are wrong and I'm wincing in excruciating pain, there's a problem.

And I started dreaming about the possibilities of Andrea Bocelli in the role.

The Micaela Liping Zhang might be okay in a better role; the bass Laurent Naouri isn't good enough for a top opera house. As for Viktoria Vizin, I felt she was over-parted, yet having seen her as Maddalena (Rig) and Mercedes she's luxury casting for those roles. Perhaps with a better conductor and better leading man she might prove to be a decent, reliable if not necessarily star mezzo (there's definitely a gorgeous voice there).

But really, that was only a summary of the dreadfulness of it. Certain aspects are perhaps forgiveable. Perhaps the bass was put off actually singing Votre toast by having to do it on horseback and then dancing on a table, and certainly those same moves hadn't shown Ildebrando D'Arcangelo in the greatest light, but I would expect a decent stab at this great aria.

There is a possibility of course that Don Jose got better in Acts III and IV but I wasn't hanging around to find out. Far too much of La fleur was shouted not sung. When he found pitch he bellowed it, with no regard for dynamic markings or for a sense of legato. But even though I winced twice and tried covering my ears it wasn't actually as bad as the Act 1 duet with Micaela - Parle-moi de ma mère. I have to say Micaela is a thankless part; requiring a very good singer, but not large enough a part to merit an established name who can deal with it. And certainly Liping Zhang started off well enough, but by the time she was losing pitch thanks to the tenor she did not sound good. And he sounded terrible. When performed well, it is a gorgeous duet - so lyrical. I adore the bit where Don Jose sings so lyrically

Ma mère, je la vois!.. oui, je revois mon village!
O souvenirs d'autrefois! doux souvenirs du pays!
/ Doux souvenirs du pays! O souvenirs chéris!

and Micaela comesback equaly lyrically. Except that this was Don José in a Bayreuth bark.

As for the conductor, the tempi were slow, painfully slow. This was apparent throughout but was particularly noticeable in the opening of Act II when there are flamenco dancers. When Pappano was conducting in December, these flamenco dancers kicked up a steamy sultry display of sensual abandonment to lively rhythms; last night it was more akin to the village tea dance and the sultry sexuality was lost.

I can deal with okay, mediocre, 'good in places' and so on, but I don't like a performance which would shame a provincial opera house. Not at one of the world's leading houses.

It still hasn't been confirmed about the TV show, but I presume - hope fervently - that it will be of Cast A under Pappano; if so, I would say drop everything and watch it. If it's Cast B, I would say, haven't you got some drying paint that needs watching.

As a pre-birthday celebration it was a sore disappointment. It's like hours of my life I can't get back, hours that would have been better spent watching Jonny "God" Wilkinson rampant as the hammer of the Scots, followed by beans on toast at home.