Love Partridge

Gosh, I don't know what's come over me; I'm obviously in tacky celebrity mode. Apparently Courtney Love is pregnant by Steve Coogan

Oh this is so wrong on so many levels. I mean, first of all, why do we give a sh*t about Courtney Love, other than the fact that she was briefly married to Kurt Cobain, a fairly good rocker who ensured legend status by dying in a drug-fuelled accident/suicide incident.

Steve Coogan? A fairly talented comedian.

Some of the quotes are fabulous:

Courtney discovered her shock news just three days ago through a home pregnancy kit.

So she has to tell the world immediately, despite the fact that she is 41 and thus, regardless of her lifestyle, at a higher risk of miscarriage?

Courtney told us: "I'd rather not talk about our relationship."

But, undeterred, she's selling her story to the NotW

Rock chick Courtney is also worried her street cred could be in tatters for dating Alan Partridge.

She told her pal: "Tell me honestly...what does it make me look like that I slept with Alan Partridge?

"Given the grade A stars I've dated it's embarrassing. I mean...Alan Partridge!"

So, the most important thing in dating a man is his status, her street cred? Not "It was literally non-stop sex. Steve is a f***ing sex addict"? Classy...